Saturday, March 28, 2009

the institution of marriage

I'm married...everyone knows that. But what everyone might not know is I don't actually believe in the institution of marriage. I lived with my husband for a very long time unmarried and we eventually fell into marriage simply to make financial and ownership opportunities easier.

I have currently gone through a rash of friends who have had or are having issues with their significant others and it only solidifies what I think about marriage. Or maybe just how I view the way most people think marriage should go.

I think marriage is pushed on us as this end all, be all of partnerships and/or companionships. This is the person that your world revolves around, the person that is the everything you need. I don't think this is realistic at all. And I think the marriages that fail (what are we up to like 50% now?) are the ones that think this is true.

I think the marriages that do work are the ones where you realize you HAVE to foster other relationships throughout your life. There is no way one person can be everything you need for this one life time.

I am one of the very lucky whose husband has allowed me to foster relationships with a group of friends that mean the world to me. He lets me wander out to happy hours, not come home at night, chat with other boys, share things with others what I don't with him and let others make me happy.

There are different parts of me...different parts of my life that need different people and I'm allowed to find people who fill the holes, niches, parts of my soul, parts of my brain, parts of me that I can't get from one person.

You're gonna need more than one person to get through this life...I think I'm one of the lucky who has found the bunch I need.

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